What Causes An Increase In Divorce Rate?

Societies are considered only the habitat of humankind. But in reality, these are the boundaries in which people not only live but interact with each other. Consequently, several kinds of relationships develop between them. “Relationships are the cement in the structure of society. By a study of relationships, one can orientate man’s place in society and the world” (Role of Relationship in society). Of all the relationships, the most powerful and creative unit on earth is marriage (Marriage the most significant relationship). Good and evil exist simultaneously, or sometimes inversely, similar is the case with marriages which are disreputable by divorces. The Merriam-Webster definition of divorce is “the action or an instance of legally dissolving a marriage.” The disintegration of marriage is quite often a sad occasion, at the very least marked by disappointment and the loss of expectations and dreams.

Likewise, there are usually numerous legitimate, emotional, parental, financial, and functional aspects that require changes in routines and responsibilities, and it can take individuals years to recapture harmony. Nevertheless, separation serves an imperative capacity in legally and emotionally liberating people to shape a more steady relationship. Divorce is the major social issue of this era because it not only affects its two primary characters, but there are some secondary characters which also get hit by this. “The psychological effects on children of divorce can be devastating, and many divorcing couples are completely oblivious to how their private ‘War of the Roses’ has lasting effects on their children”. Psychologists view this as, “Children are always the losers in divorce” (Effects of Divorce). In the recent decade, divorce has gained some controversy in sense of its rate. Some people say that divorce rate is increasing and there are some who negate this argument. From 1930 to 1655 divorce rate has risen dramatically, if in 1930 there were one out ten divorces, in 1940 two out of ten, in 1960 five out of ten, now in 2017, it is one out of two marriages. (Divorce stats).

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Although critics argue that divorce surge is over because of late marriages and birth control, however, the factors like infidelity, lack of communication and financial crisis are more influential therefore causing a substantial increase in it.Societies are considered only the habitat of humankind. But in reality, these are the boundaries in which people not only live but interact with each other. Consequently, several kinds of relationships develop between them. “Relationships are the cement in the structure of society. By a study of relationships, one can orientate man’s place in society and the world” (Role of Relationship in society). Of all the relationships, the most powerful and creative unit on earth is marriage (Marriage the most significant relationship). Good and evil exist simultaneously, or sometimes inversely, similar is the case with marriages which are disreputable by divorces.

The Merriam-Webster definition of divorce is “the action or an instance of legally dissolving a marriage.” The disintegration of marriage is quite often a sad occasion, at the very least marked by disappointment and the loss of expectations and dreams. Likewise, there are usually numerous legitimate, emotional, parental, financial, and functional aspects that require changes in routines and responsibilities, and it can take individuals years to recapture harmony. Nevertheless, separation serves an imperative capacity in legally and emotionally liberating people to shape a more steady relationship. Divorce is the major social issue of this era because it not only affects its two primary characters, but there are some secondary characters which also get hit by this.

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“The psychological effects on children of divorce can be devastating, and many divorcing couples are completely oblivious to how their private ‘War of the Roses’ has lasting effects on their children”. Psychologists view this as, “Children are always the losers in divorce” (Effects of Divorce). In the recent decade, divorce has gained some controversy in sense of its rate. Some people say that divorce rate is increasing and there are some who negate this argument. From 1930 to 1655 divorce rate has risen dramatically, if in 1930 there were one out ten divorces, in 1940 two out of ten, in 1960 five out of ten, now in 2017, it is one out of two marriages. (Divorce stats). Although critics argue that divorce surge is over because of late marriages and birth control, however, the factors like infidelity, lack of communication and financial crisis are more influential therefore causing a substantial increase in it.

Infidelity is rated as one of the principal causes of divorce. Adultery means that someone is having an affair while being committed to another relationship. Infidelity can be in the form of physical or emotional attachment. To understand how cheating actually works, one needs to study the psychology of infidelity. It explains all the reasons of why a person cheats and why a divorce happens due to infidelity. There are three reasons infidelity causes to divorce. The first one is a denial of the problem, in which person refuses to believe that their spouse is involved with someone else. The second one is inappropriately expressed anger, in which person gets mad at his spouse in a very strange and repeating manner. ‘Feelings of rejection’ is the third reason, a person starts to feel that his spouse has replaced him with someone else and this complex of emotions leads to divorce at the end (Cheating and divorce). “Infidelity is, in fact, one of the most common causes of couples seeking to counsel; Infidelity; whether considered, presumed, or committed” (Cheating in marriages).

The state of being unfaithful to a spouse.      Ghandar

Adultery connotes a crisis to most couples and they come in overflowed with the sentiment. Adultery shows his presence in a room like someone else or an entity that was impelled into the whole scene like a bomb, destroying lives. Life moves toward becoming enraptured into before’s and after’s. Some people can repair the harm done, transform a treachery into an open door for development and re-coupling. Furthermore, some cannot, if trust is lost then it can be irreparable for one, the continued outrage and censure horrendous for the other. There are three fundamental reasons which lead to an affair; emotional, physical, or practical. “Probably the most commonly cited cause of infidelity is a sense of emotional disconnection from a partner” (Infidelity in relationships).

The person obliging the disloyalty will frequently depict having felt neglected, desolate, and tragic. These feelings can regularly prompt the optional sentiments of outrage and hatred. Hysterical roots can provoke issues, both passionate and physical in nature. A sentimental affair may start off looking for friendship, yet after some time the level of closeness increments and more particular information, mainly that identifying with disappointment and despondency in their essential relationship, can turn into a fundamental piece of the dynamic. The companion starts to go up against the part as the accomplice, turning into a substitute in plans, thoughts, and fantasies. Thailand is the country with highest infidelity rate of 56 percent in the world then comes to Denmark 46 percent, Italy 45 percent, Germany 45 percent and so on.  In 2007, extramarital affairs caused 29 percent of breakups. Infidelity due to male is accounted for 75 percent of marriage breakdowns, while 22 percent of the time it was women who committed adultery (Rates of Divorce for Adultery and Infidelity).

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Lack of communication is also considered a cause for an increase in marital breakups.” Communication allows an exchange of emotions between people” (Poor communication). It is not likely that you will get to know what is going on in your partner’s mind without talking to each other. “A lack of communication can quickly cause misunderstandings, resentments, and feelings that you are emotionally far away or distant from each other” (Effects of lack of communications). The proverb ‘Silence is golden’ may be a smart advice before judging someone but experts agree that it can be a dangerous mistake in relationships.

According to Kerry Patterson, co-author in New York Times, couples who argue effectively are ten times happier in their relationship than those who do not talk. He discovered that four out of five people believe poor communication plays an influential role in the dissolution of relationships. When couples do not talk in the hope of avoiding an argument, it establishes resentment in their dealings. Almost all psychologists suggest that the best way to prevent a conflict is to be assertive in your communications, and be as clear or precise as possible (Source of conflict in a relationship) The site YourTango.com asked 100 mental health specialists to recognize elements that prompt separation. Of those surveyed, 65 percent said that correspondence issues were at the top of the list. A related variable, an inability to cooperate to resolve strife, was referred to by 43 percent of those surveyed as second on the rundown. Although these outcomes affirm what many individuals have already known, the study found that men and ladies have various dissensions about their partners’ communication skills altogether.

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For instance, roughly 70 percent of people who said their relationship ended because of correspondence issues said that nagging and grumbling were the primary issues. Around 60 percent of men distinguished their accomplices’ inability to appreciate as the primary communication factor that leads to divorce. More than 80 percent of women said that their relationship ended up in divorce because their partners did not do enough to validate their opinions and feelings (Lack of communication). Success and survival of a relationship depend on how well both the partners communicate with each other. As the communication between the partners in a relationship ends, both feel loneliness in their emotions and feelings. Also, there can be some crucial questions in their minds that will be left unanswered due to a loss of communication. This causes depression in them, and in depression, a person’s’ decision-making ability is very weak. Due to this, a person takes decisions that are quite unusual sometimes.

Consequently, this awkward situation ends up splitting them in the form of divorce. Another aspect of communication crisis is that it can be because of fear of rejection and can be a product of inferiority complex. Fear of rejection can be a consequence of bad parenting. A person suffering from this syndrome barely speaks with his spouse because he does not want to get rejected. Under inferiority complex, a person thinks that his talking is always useless and purposeless. This kind of underestimation of personal abilities, refrains him to participate in the conversation and the result of which is blunt.

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The financial crisis is also a leading cause of the dissolution of some marriages. Escalating unemployment rate, consumer credit card debt, rampant foreclosures, a global recession, and a trillion-dollar national deficit are all contributing to the demise of marriages. There is a very strong relationship between money and happiness. Like every other factor, good financials are necessary for stability in a relationship. As wealthier people are happier than poorer one, rich countries are happier than poor one too, this expresses a strong correlation between income and happiness (Money buy happiness). Most couples cannot deal with the weights of losing a home, getting laid off, or evading bill collectors. The disappointment of not having enough money to make a decent living can drive even cheerfully wedded couples to diversion. Married couples who separate due to cash misfortunes are rapidly getting to be as ordinary as the couples who isolate because of infidelity. If there are money fights in your relationship, then everything is normal. Money tends to change the minds of a person involved in a relationship through a process of ‘comparison’.

According to this process, your spouse or partner compares your financial condition with someone else. If they are better off in their lives and your financials are not sufficient, then there will be a demand for increasing money funds by your partner. Because the increase is not possible on sudden demand of it, there will be clashes in the relationship. And this whole process will end up in the form of separation. “Arguments about money is by far the top predictor of divorce, said Dr. Sonya Britt, assistant professor of family studies and human services and program director of personal financial planning at Kansas State University” (Money arguments are a top predictor of divorce). She in her research about family relations said that it takes very long for couples to recover from financial-based arguments. Also, more often couples use harsher language in an argument which makes the situation even worse. According to a survey of people in a relationship or partnership, finances are the chief cause of stress in a relationship. Some 33 percent of correspondents who are experiencing stress in their relationships, said money was the primary reason. “Money really touches everything. It impacts people’s lives, said Emmet Burns, brand marketing director for SunTrust” (Money is the leading cause of stress).

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There are times when partners also do not realize the main reason for the arguments. Because people do not realize this problem as a cause. Therefore, this issue with the passage of time grows more and more, enhancing stress in their lives. “A study by Jeffrey Dew of Utah State University found that couples who fight about money once a week are 30% more likely to end up divorced than those who disagree over money only a few times a month.” (Why money issues still ruining marriages). These kinds of situations also create trust issues between both the partners that are involved in a relationship. Another aspect of money problem can be in this way, that one’s spouse before marriage belongs to a richer family who can afford any expensive item. But now the person is restricted to buy only cheap and low-quality goods. This sudden shift in the lifestyle can panic that person if that person is emotionally weak. This causes arguments between them, and again they ended up separating.

Critics believe that divorce surge is over, but the myth lives on. “It is no longer true that the divorce rate is rising, or that half of all marriages end in divorce. It has not been for some time” (Divorce surge is over, but myth lives on). They believe that divorce rate is falling because of late marriages, birth-control, and the rise of so-called love marriages. These arguments themselves are not so fallacious, but the claim is. The trend of late marriages is the product of present decade, and it is not very common in every country of the world. For example, there are more than fifty Islamic states on the world’s map. Almost all of these countries by following the true teachings of Islam did not allow late marriages. Because Islam has strictly prohibited in Quran, that whenever girl or boy turns to teenage, find them a good match and then marry them without delaying it.

Trend Chaser

 

Not only Islam, Christianity, Hinduism and near about every religion oppose late marriages, not directly but at the very least consider it a bad gesture. Late marriage can be an artifact of high literacy rate and a better understanding of society and all its elements. So even this trend is gaining height by every passing day, this is not so influential yet to cause a decrease in the divorce rate. There is a childbirth control policy in many of the big and famous countries around the globe. But countries like Pakistan, India, and Indonesia there is no stringent implication of this policy. Now, this factor cannot be counted as the one which can cause any minute decrease in the divorce rate. Also, the people of these countries are not so well-educated, and they are very ill-aware of the advantage of childbirth control, enough to implement it by themselves. There is a rise in the ratio of so-called love marriages, but this is usually apparent in developed countries. In developing countries, people still love to be conventional in their methodologies.” Indians are still prevalent in thinking of marriage as a set-up in which a person should fit into the family” (Love marriages vs. arrange marriages). Arrange marriage proportion in India is 74 percent. The average global divorce rate for arranged marriages is only 4 percent while divorce rate for love marriage is staggering 55 percent, according to statistics verified by UNICEF, Human Rights Council, and ABC News.

There is a rise in the ratio of so-called love marriages, but this is usually apparent in developed countries. In developing countries, people still love to be conventional in their methodologies.” Indians are still prevalent in thinking of marriage as a set-up in which a person should fit into the family” (Love marriages vs. arrange marriages). Arrange marriage proportion in India is 74 percent. The average global divorce rate for arranged marriages is only 4 percent while divorce rate for love marriage is staggering 55 percent, according to statistics verified by UNICEF, Human Rights Council, and ABC News. The Times of India wrote an article in which they prove that divorce rate is increasing due to love marriages. Dunya news of Pakistan also published an article on the same issue, which proved an increase in divorces due to love marriages. All of these three arguments are vague enough to be neglected.

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According to recent statistics published by Dawn, “13,299 Khula cases were reported in the Punjab in 2012, which later rose to 14,243 in 2013, and in 2014, they went up to 16,942. In 2016, they have increased to 18,901” (Divorce rate is rising). “The number of divorces in England and Wales has slightly increased- as shown by the latest figures from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) showing a total of 118,140 divorces in 2012 – an increase of 0.5% since 2011” (Divorce rates). The reason divorce rate is increasing and not decreasing is very simple. The factors that are meant to cause a fall in divorce rate are very less influential than those that are making an increase in it. The number to number comparison also awards victory to the factors making an increase in rate.The divorce rate is rising and societies are facing some serious concerns. The reason can be anyone of those or all, that are explained earlier but the fact is open and clear that divorce rate has been increasing since several decades.

In 2016, they have increased to 18,901” (Divorce rate is rising). “The number of divorces in England and Wales has slightly increased- as shown by the latest figures from the Office for National Statistics (ONS) showing a total of 118,140 divorces in 2012 – an increase of 0.5% since 2011” (Divorce rates). The reason divorce rate is increasing and not decreasing is very simple. The factors that are meant to cause a fall in divorce rate are very less influential than those that are making an increase in it. The number to number comparison also awards victory to the factors making an increase in rate.The divorce rate is rising and societies are facing some serious concerns. The reason can be anyone of those or all, that are explained earlier but the fact is open and clear that divorce rate has been increasing since several decades.

Muslim Marriage Guide

There are researchers who are trying to prove that divorce is not an issue and it is just a myth. The factors that are causing a decline in it are expected to be influential in future. Divorce itself is not a problem but the aftermaths of it are very difficult to handle. Children are facing with very serious psychological problems. Most of the times they consider themselves as the cause of divorce between parents. And due to this, they attempt to suicide and this kind of several extremist acts. Children of divorced parents suffer from anyone of a few illnesses including sorrow, wrongdoing, social issues and low school execution. Not only this there are several economic and social damage to society whenever a couple is split up into two. Divorce usually consequences into two households where there was one household before.

A lot of people do not have extra money for living expenses because now there are two family units that are living on the same money which used to be a single unit in the past. And this implies that both the partners or anyone one of them will live a lower standard life after divorce. They will no doubt need to watch their spending more than ever. This shows that increase in divorce rate is a serious threat to the development of any country.


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